I have one week left until graduation. Here is my schedule:

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Monday: happy hour with social justice high school friends at 4PM, potluck with IGR cohort at 8PM.

Tuesday: lunch with Sam from Potato Chips at 12PM, meeting for ministry-related clothing line at 2PM, bowling with Potato Chips at 10PM.

Wednesday: lunch with IGR friends at 12PM, stroganoff night at Old German then Student Night at Rave Cinemas with freshman year crew at 6PM.

Thursday: IGR graduation at 12PM, senior photos then bar crawl with freshman year crew at 3PM, go out with LGM seniors at 12AM.

Friday: Communications graduation with Amy at 11AM, dinner with freshman year crew at 7PM.

Saturday: Graduation Day.

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It’s almost a perfectly even split between the three communities I have right now. This doesn’t mean that I’m perfectly at peace with all of them: I recognize that I’m doing to Potato Chips what I did to Jamie and Kanghoon as a junior, even to my school friends as a high schooler. I want to spend time with them and appreciate them despite the qualms I have, because I also recognize that they have supported me and have been mostly receptive to when Amy or I challenge their problematic statements. I recognize that I’ve only gotten to know my IGR friends mostly this semester, and that it may not be a strong enough foundation for a long-lasting friendship outside of campus. I recognize that my connections with the freshman year crew can be somewhat shallow in comparison to the deep talks I have about faith in LGM or liberation in IGR.

 

But I also recognize that with such little time left with these people, I want to set aside these complicated thoughts and just spend the time with them as I can. Friends and communities will never be this accessible to me ever again. I’m going to have to learn to be even more intentional with the people I surround myself with, to really put in the effort to keep in touch with people. I’m going to have to think about how to balance having important expectations of inclusivity and equity with just appreciating and accepting them for who they are despite inevitable failures by them and by myself.  But right now, this week, I just want to be with people I love before I have to say 안녕.

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